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Some Patriot: Robert Kraft’s $44 Gal. Water Spigot

Drilling oil costs $7/gal. Filtered tap water at Gillette Stadium costs $44/gal. A forensic audit of Robert Kraft’s $10M pouring rights, banned thermoses, and the dirty business of stadium hydration.

San Diego’s own Rose Fletcher, Broker (CADRE 02098408)—operating as Shiny Fang, MBA—alongside The Late Mark Whitney (The Late Shady O’Leery) perform a forensic audit on Gillette Stadium’s 550 concession points.

In this episode of ASSSONOMICS, we break down Robert Kraft’s eight-figure Coke vs. Pepsi pouring rights bidding war, expose the 3,000% markup on $7 20oz bottles of gussied-up tap water ($44 a gallon), and demonstrate how stadium landlords use security theater to enforce food and beverage gameday monopolies.

Along the way, Shiny & Shady flip the script on metabolic extortion and ask three sovereign questions:

  • What if YOU are The Platform?

  • What if YOU write the Terms Of Service?

  • What if YOU DEplatform, DEmonetize, and DEsubscribe the individuals and organizations that are causing harm?

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